


In Dreams

by Phoenix2312



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Dreams, Friendship, Gen, Past/Present/Future
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-29 09:19:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6368992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenix2312/pseuds/Phoenix2312
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alec can't understand why Izzy and Jace have both betrayed him, can't understand why they are so angry at him he's only following the law, but sometimes honorable intentions go astray... After the events of 1x09 (and part of 1x10) Alec is exhausted and falls into bed hoping to rest. Instead he's riddled with dreams of past, present and future, and they shake him to the core.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> So this angsty little one-shot is set after 1x09. It was meant to be posted before 1x10 but life happens. So here it is now. Semi-spoilers for the books, particularly City of Glass, but this is still set in the TV show.
> 
> Enjoy.

Alec was exhausted, mind, body and soul. As a matter of fact he couldn't remember ever being so drained, and that was saying something considering he was a shadowhunter.

He plopped down on his bed, unlaced his boots and kicked them off. Without even realising it, he let out a deep breath and buried his face in his hands.

The events of the last few hours, the last few days really, flashing through his mind. Watching Jace walk away from him, standing by while Lydia arrested Isabelle, discovering that the cup and necklace were both missing and realizing that Magnus was in league with Jace, Clary and Isabelle.

But even though they'd all left him, all broken the law, all betrayed him, he kept repeating the same words over and over, 'You're doing the right thing. The law is hard but it is the law."

Over and over he repeated the mantra as he made himself get ready for bed, and minutes later he finally fell atop the blankets.

By the time his head hit the pillow, sleep had taken him but it wasn't the peaceful dreamless night he'd hoped for.

Alec saw himself fighting with Jace, saw himself pin his parabatai to the ground just outside the City of Bones, saw himself put a seraph blade to Jace's throat.

It was a strange experience watching things from this perspective. He could see so much more.

He saw the look in Jace's eyes as he finally let him go, watched his parabatai jump up from the ground with determination, defiance and perhaps a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"Come with me Alec."

The words hung in the stillness. Dream Alec glanced at himself, watching many expressions cross his face before he delivers his answer, the one he doesn't regret.

"No."

Alec thought he remembered the expression on his parabatai's face, thought he'd seen hurt, confusion, and regret there. But seeing it now, in the dream, from his new perspective he saw the truth, that while those emotions all passed over the hardened features, the fire burning in Jace's eyes told another story. It was fury and betrayal like Alec had never seen. The look screamed out into the night. I will never forgive you.

Alec had to look away, he couldn't tell if the look had been real or if it was dream induced but either way it sent an ache through him. And by the time he willed himself to look back, the other boy was gone.

Then the dream changed.

Alec was now back in the Institute watching as Lydia and her guards lead his sister away. He stands there in shock, both versions of himself.

True to what had really happened he calls out, tells Lydia to wait, tries to protest, but even to his own ears it sounds feeble and weak. Because in the back of his mind he knows that Isabelle has broken the law. But still, she's his sister and he calls out to her once again, she turns to look at him over her shoulder as she's being taken.

"This isn't your fight Alec. You made your choice, and I made mine. I don't regret it. I saved someone, the consequences are irrelevant, that's what you do when you really love someone. You fight for them, break the law, risk your life, you do whatever it takes. "

And with her last words hanging in the air, and a look that only Isabelle can give, she is gone.

Lydia comes up behind him and puts a hand on his arm.

"She admitted it Alec, she broke the law. There was nothing I could do."

And once again the dream is torn away from him, replaced with another.

He was back outside the entrance to the City of Bones, and at first it appears deserted, then he hears footsteps.

He sees a dozen figures moving towards him, Lydia's holding onto Isabelle's arm, her wrists bound. The guard members hold glowing seraph blades, bows, sabers and knives. They look more prepared than when they'd been with him escorting Meliorn to the Silent Brothers.

They move in a tight knit group, all at the ready, no one speaking until Lydia barks out a command.

He sees them before she does, before anyone does he thinks.

Wolves.

Dozen of them, surrounding the place, and even in dream form it's a weird sense of deja vu.

Despite all of it he almost laughs to himself because it's so like Jace to pull the same stunt twice, and it's brilliant really because despite the guard's preparedness, he knows they aren't expecting the same type of attack.

Suddenly he sees a flash of movement to his right and he jerks his head around and catches the passing flash of inhuman speed. Vampires.

A realization washes over him as he stands there unseen, his other dreams had been visions of the past, but this, this must be a vision of the present.

His gaze snaps back to Lydia, Isabelle and the guards as his sister lets out a nearly inhuman laugh that seems almost deranged.

Lydia tells her to be quiet, but it's too late. From all sides wolves are leaping, vampires speeding past, the group is caught off guard. They try and aim, try to pinpoint their enemies but it's no use.

A loud, deep voice booms around them, startling nearly everyone.

"You say you act because of the law, but you act out of hatred. Release Isabelle Lightwood, and we will retreat. No injustice will happen on this night."

The voice is enough to distract the guards and one by one they crumple unconscious to the ground.

Alec watches as Isabelle, who's been still as a statue, leaps into action. And even without the use of her hands she is deadly.

She wraps one leg around Lydia's knocking her to the ground. Without hesitation she is on top of the blonde, using her elbows, knees and feet to deal blow after blow as the two women wrestle. And Alec doesn't even have to see the scene up close to know.

Lydia is no match for Isabelle. Skilled and trained shadowhunter though his fiancé no doubtedly is, she fights by the rules, her moves are blow by blow from the codex , she has nothing on Isabelle. Isabelle who never plays by the rules, who does whatever it takes no matter the cost, Isabelle who burns with a fire that is an excruciating, blinding, a white hot inferno.

Lydia's voice splits the night in a piercing scream.

When Isabelle stands up, her hands still partially bound, he sees that Lydia is concious, but undoubtedly defeated. She has four long scratches across her cheek, they aren't bleeding heavily, but they are bloody none the less. He sees the blood under Isabelle's nails and knows it was the source of the scream and the surrender.

"That's for Meliorn. And really you're lucky it isn't worse. If I had my way I'd kill you here and now for destroying downworlders, destroying my family, trying to destroy the man I love. But I'm not like you, I don't kill for fun."

With that she walks several steps away, Lydia all the while trying to scramble to her feet. But by the time she does Isabelle has been whisked off into the night. Alec thinks he catches a glimpse of Simon, running with Isabelle in his arms.

Lydia stands in the clearing, alone and filled with rage, he can see it boiling on her face, and for the first time she looks demented, pure evil. He swallows hard.

Before she can move to do anything there is a flash of silver in the air. A dagger is hurtling towards her Alec thinks it's going to hit her squarely in the face. Instead it flies by her, grazing the cheek Isabelle hadn't attacked. A few drops of blood drip and she reaches up to touch the new wound.

"That's for turning Alec into a monster."

Of course Alec recognizes the voice and desperately looks around for the source of it as his heart drops at the words.

Several shadows are lurking on the roof of a nearby building. He can tell from Lydia's expression that she doesn't know the voice, and can't see where it's coming from.

He watches as Jace's shadow disappears, followed by two figures one taller and one slighter.

Alec sees a flash of red hair, and the spark of a blue flame. And his dream is shifting again.

This time he's standing in a massive room, and although he's never been here before he knows what this place is. The Hall of Accords in Idris.

Looking around he realises that the room is packed with people, every seat is taken, and all the walls are lined with more people standing. The only partially empty space is at the front of the room where there is a large platform in middle of the hall. Only two people stand there, and he recognizes both- the Inquisitor and the Consul.

Beside the platform, Alec sees four large, high-backed wooden seats, that he can't remember being there in any of the pictures he's seen. They somehow look out of place.

But he doesn't keep his gaze there for long, instead he begins to search the room for familiar faces amongst the crowd.

It takes him a minute or two but he spots a familiar head of bright red hair in the front row, he moves in to see Clary better only to realise it isn't Clary at all. This woman is older, and up close he can see her hair is a little darker shade of red, she can only be Jocelyn Fairchild.

Moving his gaze from Clary's mother he feels a start when his eyes land on two more familiar people farther down the row.

His parents are sitting with a small empty space in the middle, it takes his mind a moment to realise why... Max should be there. His little brother, he always sits between the two, but the seat is empty and it's then he sees the white clothes his parents are wearing. For Shadowhunters white only means one thing, death. A burst of pain shoots through his heart as he realises the truth. Max is dead.

Not able to look at their grief stricken faces any longer he continues searching the hall for the others when he stops dead in his tracks.

It's almost like looking in a mirror when he sees himself, only it's different because he looks different.

The dream version of himself is thinner, paler, with longer hair and dark circles under his eyes, which are downcast and saddened.

Looking at the seat next to his dream self he sees Lydia, who is much the same, only now she looks a little older, a little more worn, and even the passage of an unknown amount of time has not made the scars, from Isabelle, on her face vanish completely.

He can also see the edge of a rune peaking out from under the neckline of her blouse, a marriage rune.

Looking around the room once more he notices only one last thing, his parents aren't the only ones in mourning clothes, nearly half of all the people in the hall are in their white clothes all marked with red runes.

His mind racing he tries to understand what has happened, because so far all he knows is that is little brother is dead, he's married and his sister and his parabatai are missing.

Playing detective he comes to the conclusion that whatever this is, it must be the future. His previous dreams were both past and present, so it only makes sense.

Alec is ripped from his reverie when Consul Penhallow steps forward and begins to speak, an impenetrable silence falling over the entire room at once.

"Welcome Nephilim, welcome friends to our celebration ceremony. We are here today to honour those lost and celebrate alliances gained, we are also here to acknowledge the heroes of the Mortal War, without whom today would not be what it is."

More silence and Alec just stares up at the Consul, he can't stop mouthing the words 'the Mortal War'

"Today we rejoice for Valentine Morgenstern has been defeated, his body burned, his ashes buried, the Mortal cup as been returned to the Clave, and we will once again resign the Accords of Peace. Although I know this day comes at a heavy price for many, we have lost nephilim both young and old, we have seen all but a few of the Silent Brothers slaughtered, we have watched many of our new allies fall around us. But in their sacrifice we find hope and victory."

Alec can feel he mouth hanging open, Consul Penhallow's words settling over him like a weight.

"It is the decision of the Clave, to add four seats to our council today." She gestures towards the four empty chairs.

"In light of recent events, we have found it fit to offer one seat to each of the downworlder races that have allied themselves with us and fought alongside us to prevail victorious in the war."

With these words a door off the side of the hall opens and four men enter the room. Although the group of them could not look more different, they wear identical expressions on their faces.

"For your contribution to the war, we offer these seats on our council to the bravest and the best of your kind."

Alec stares in blank shock as the four men turn to face the crowd, each standing in front of the wooden seat.

"To you, Meliorn of the Fairfolk, to you, Raphael Santiago of the night's children, to you Lucien Greymark of the moon's children, and to you Magnus Bane of Lilith's children, do you accept these seats among the Council and Clave?"

In unison the four men reply "We do." And one by one they take their seats.

Alec can't stop staring up at Magnus, Magnus who should've been considered a traitor, Magnus who stole from and eluded the Clave, Magnus who had betrayed him. But apparently whatever he had done in the war was such that it allowed him this new honour, a place on the Nephilm council where his opinion and voice would be heard.

"And now, Nephilim, Downworlder's, council representatives, I would like to introduce the heroes of the Mortal war. Four young people that despite their unorthodox and rule breaking ideas have brought us both victory and new allies. I'm proud to introduce the three best and brightest Shadowhunters of a generation along with their Vampire companion."

Alec feels another shock run through him, and suddenly he understands everything, what has happened, the events that led up to the war, and through the war. Somehow, although he doesn't know how, he understands that almost two years have passed since he watched Jace walk away from him in the City of Bones.

"I give you, Simon Lewis, Clarissa Fairchild, Isabelle Lightwood and Jonathan Lightwood Herondale."

The room erupts in cheers as the four of them enter the hall and make their way up to the platform, in turns they shake both the Inquisitor's and the Consul's hands.

Alec can see how they all look different, but also the same, he can see an easy confidence radiating off of Simon as he stands next to Clary. Can see the defined tone and muscle on Clary's body the the new found grace with which she holds herself. Izzy is the most like herself, her hair long and wavy, eyes shining as she looks over at Meliorn. Jace is taller and thicker than before and he looks happier than Alec's ever seen him. When he takes a step forward a hush falls over the crowd once more.

"Thank you all for the support you have shown to us in these past weeks. It has not been an easy task but we have prevailed victorious once more. I stand before you today, considered a hero for my actions, however the truth is, that my actions are no more heroic than any of yours. We all fought in the war, we all did our duty to protect and serve. And though at times many of you questioned me, questioned us, called us rebels and traitors, some of you even tried to prosecute us, but still we stood by our beliefs, stood by our ideas and our morals, no matter how radical they often seemed. For the four of us, and for many others like us, our only goal was ever to beat Valentine any way we could, and our greatest triumph in doing so is finding a common enemy for all people of the shadow world to fight against. In past we have seen downworlders as different from ourselves because we thought they had different ideals than ourselves when in truth, many of them like us seek only to rid the world of evil. But today I am proud to be Nephilim, proud to be a member of the clave, proud to stand before you with my best friend Simon, my sister Isabelle and my fiancé, Clary, by my side, part of a new generation of warriors, as the last of the Herondale bloodline and as the son of the Lightwoods."

Jace reaches over clasps Simon hard are the back, before wrapping an arm around Izzy's shoulder and clasping hands with Clary who is beaming up at him.

"Thank you Jace, for those words, I know your little brother would be proud of you."

Jace smiles at the Consul before moving to follow the others off the platform.

Clary is in her mother's arms, Luke moving from his chair to join them, shaking hands with Simon and smiling proudly.

Alec's father has picked Izzy up and is hugging her like he used to do when she was a small child, his only daughter in a family of boys. Jace moves into Maryse's waiting arms, and she embraces him fiercely, lovingly as only a mother can.

Soon Raphael, Meliorn and Magnus have joined the mix, Meliorn kissing Isabelle, Magnus shaking hands with Robert as the man clasps him on the back. Raphael talking with Luke and Simon, Maryse and Jocelyn chatting together, Clary and Jace, standing a little apart holding hands, with easy smiles on their faces.

Out of the corner of his eye, he watches himself and Lydia nervously approach the celebrating group.

Upon their arrival, he watches Magnus, Raphael, Luke and Jocelyn disappear into the crowd. And he watches as himself and Lydia face his family.

He can't hear what's being said but he can tell it's forced and awkward. He can see the way Isabelle moves to stand in front of Meliorn protectively, staring daggers at Lydia. His father and Jace both shake his hand stiffly, his mother gives him a quick hug and doesn't acknowledge his wife at all. Clary gives a polite wave but Simon is standing in front of her, and like Isabelle his gaze is like ice.

Alec feels his heart start to crack. What has he done?

And as quick as it came, the dream dissolves again.

It's a dark, cold night the air is crisp and it stings his skin even in dream form. He wanders idly for a while up and down the side walks of a city he's all too familiar with, Brooklyn.

Suddenly, without knowing how he's on the staircase of a fire escape, about three floors up from what he can tell. There is a window in front of him, but the curtains are drawn. No sooner than he thinks it, a shimmering hole appears in the centre of them, as if a warlock cast a glamour spell.

Slowly, unconsciously he moves towards the window. Inside he can see a garishly furnished apartment living room, complete with a crackling fire, a bright silver and blue Christmas tree covered in baubles, and a small striped cat curled up near the huge mound of brightly coloured packages.

Stepping in closer he can just make out voices, quite a few from what he can tell. But they are still out of sight, perhaps in the kitchen from his take on the place.

He realises absently that this is his dream and he could walk away if he wants, but something keeps him rooted to the spot. Suddenly two people appear in the doorway, and he recognizes them immediately although they are both quite a bit older than they were before.

Jocelyn and Luke move into the room, laughing and holding hands. He watches as they take a seat on the large area rug.

Only moments later he watches Simon walk into the room, his pale skin almost silver in the firelight, he's got a huge smile on his face at he leads a girl Alec doesn't recognize to the sofa near Jocelyn.

She's pretty, with dark hair and caramel coloured skin, and when he gets a better view of her, he sees the green gleam in her eyes. She's a werewolf, one of Luke's most likely.

Simon and the wolf girl are having an animated conversion and Alec can hear them clearly discussing some type of game he's never heard of.

Jocelyn listens to the conversation affectionately before calling the cat over towards her.

"Here kitty kitty kitty, Chairman Meow, come here my fluffy little kitty."

Luke chuckles at her, but the cat seems more than happy to obey her baby-talking as he stands, stretches and moves to sit in her lap.

Suddenly a loud noise comes from the kitchen and three more people appear. Clary's rolling her eyes at the person behind her, before silently moving to sit on the floor near her mother.

Isabelle and Meliorn are visible in the doorway, and they're kissing passionately, which Alec figures is the reason for Clary's eye roll.

He hates watching his sister with the fairy knight but can't seem to look away as he takes in the fact that she appears to be at least five years older than the last time he'd seen her. Although she's still Isabelle and her looks haven't faded one-bit, just shifted and matured.

Someone clears their throat loudly and another figure appears in the doorway, startling Alec even more.

Jace, who too, looks much older and in his case a little more battle scared. He's holding something in his arms that Alec can't quite see.

"Isabelle must you do that in front of my son?! He really is much to young for that sort of thing."

She breaks away from Meliorn and glares at Jace "It's not like he hasn't seen it before, you can Clary can barely keep your hands off of each other."

Clary lets out a cry of protest from her seat on the floor and everyone else just chuckles.

"While that statement is true, we at least don't do it in front of the baby. But I suppose he should get used to it with you as his aunt and godmother."

A pain shoots into Alec's heart.

Suddenly the baby in Jace's arms stirs and Alec realises it isn't a baby at all, but a toddler. A small boy with pink cheeks, red blonde curls and tawny eyes.

He rubs a fist over his eyes and yawns before looking around the room.

Isabelle and Meliorn have taken their place on the love seat, and the little boy smiles at Izzy and waves.

She waves back and smiles at him.

Suddenly the toddler is squirming in Jace's arms.

"Down daddy down." the boy cries out, half laughing, half yelling.

Jace chuckles and holds on to the boy, they play wrestle for a minute before the boy looks around again.

"Granpa help help. Granpa!"

Luke chuckles at the boy and Jace shakes his head.

"Betrayed by my own son! Seriously what does a dad have to do around here."

Jace is smiling though, looking at Luke half teasing.

"You know how it is Jace, no one is better than Grandpa, not to a little boy."

Jace shakes his head but grins as Luke begins playing with the toddler.

A few minutes later, out of nowhere another figure appears in the doorway, and it causes Alec's heart to skip a beat.

Magnus.

The warlock comes up next to Jace, looking as wild and flamboyant as ever with his ugly Christmas sweater and sequin reindeer slippers. But Alec can see the amusement and affection in his eyes as he looks around the room at the group.

Him and Jace begin an idle conversation in the doorway, as Luke continues to play with the child on the floor. Clary is sitting next to her mother, and Simon and the werewolf girl are playing cards on the coffee table nearby.

Alec can see that Isabelle has moved into Meliorn's lap as she coerces him into a red Father Christmas hat. His eyes smile with mischief as he swiftly pushes an pointed elf's hat onto her dark tresses, she looks indignant for a moment before they both burst out laughing. Everyone stops what they're doing to see what has caused the sound. Everyone grins at the sight.

Hearing his aunt's laughter the little boy looks up at her and smiles before turning to look at his father, wanting to show him Aunt Izzy's funny hat.

"Daddy look at auntie..."

But he trails off and instead his gold eyes focus on Magnus.

In seconds the boy is clambering out of Luke's arms and running, wobbly, towards the warlock.

Without hesitation he scoops him up into his arms with practised hands.

"Unle Magnus!" The toddler screeches in joy as the warlock tosses him into the air and catches him again. The boy roars with laughter. Jace smiles at them before looking over to Luke.

"What were you saying about Grandpas always being a little boys' favourite... It appears that Uncle Magnus is his favourite" Jace's tone is amused and Luke returns his gaze.

"Ah well, I can dream can't I? But heck I can't compete with that!" He points good naturedly back towards Magnus and the toddler, as the warlock flicks around blue sparks.

"Clearly you cannot compete with that Luke, but you're still the number one grandpa in my book."

Luke looks up at the werewolf girl and she smiles wryly at him. He throws a pillow at her.

"You better watch it Maia or I'll regret making you second in command." His tone is light hearted but Alec definitely hears him mumble something about showing her who's a grandpa. Unfortunately her wolf hearing picks it up and she throws the pillow back at him with a laugh.

They all laugh again and another pain shoots through Alec's heart as he watches.

He can clearly see the love and affection these people have for each other, can clearly see that they are well practised at being together like this. He suddenly wonders how many holidays and birthdays have been spent exactly like this.

Before he can think on it much more his gaze is drawn back to Magnus who's seated on the sofa nearest to the tree and the toddler who is standing in front of him looking at him with big golden eyes that are full of admiration.

With a flourish Magnus produces a sparkly blue, child-sized cape and ties it around the boy's neck.

"Now my little apprentice, I think it's time we hand out these gifts! We can work together to use our magic to pass them around, sound good?"

The boy claps his hands and smiles, "I ready unle Magnus!"

Adorably Magnus uses the hand behind his back to produce blue sparks as he levitates each present, making the child believe he is the one casting the spell.

He is absolutely delighted and everyone watches the scene unfold with loving gazes on the boy.

Jace has taken a seat on the sofa near Simon and Maia, and Clary has shifted to rest her back against his legs.

"Do you think I should be concerned that our son thinks he is a warlock instead of a Shadowhunter?"

Clary smiles at him.

"I don't think I"d be worried, Magnus is good with him."

Indeed that was the clear truth, and it hurts Alec more than he can even comprehend.

Suddenly there is a commotion as the toddler realises that he cannot hand out the last of the presents. His eyes go wide and there is confusion and fear in his eyes as he looks up at Magnus.

"Unle Magnus where Nana and Papa?"

Without missing a beat he scoops the boy up into his lap.

"Not to fret my little apprentice, Nana and Papa are still in Idris, I'm going to get them tomorrow in the portal... Do you remember the portal, big, shiny and takes us to different places?"

Gold eyes full of trust he looks up and nods at Magnus, seeming to understand.

"That's my nephew, the brightest two year old of a generation!"

Everyone laughs at that, even the little boy, until he goes suddenly still.

"Unle Magnus laugh later,presents now?"

Everyone laughs harder at this, but Magnus gets a twinkle in his eye.

"I like the way you think my little Max."

And suddenly Alec is wrenched from the staircase, back into the icy cold street below. His heart is racing and he can feel tears in his eyes.

Max. Jace and Clary had called their son Max after the brother they'd lost in the war, Isabelle had been made his godmother, and even his parents were involved with the child. But he was no where to be seen, even Magnus had been there, cradling the child like he'd been doing it for years, which he probably had been, ever since Max had been born.

Alec doesn't understand can't process how his life turned out like this. How did this happen?!

Tears are falling from his eyes and he falls to his knees.

And then without warning he's sitting bolt upright in his bed at the Institute. There is sweat on his forehead and he's panting hard.

It takes several minutes for him to calm down enough to take in the situation, when suddenly it hits him...

The future hadn't happened yet, his dream was only an image of what was too come if things continued as they were... He jumped out a bed nearly tripping in his haste. Hundreds of thoughts fly through his brain, memories of the dreams, all the things he'd seen. But he knew it wasn't definite, he could change it. He wouldn't give up without a fight, he'd get his family back, his friends back, he'd get Magnus back.

Throwing on some clothes he raced out of his room, down the hall to the weapons room. Quickly and silently he loaded up on weapons slinging his bow and quiver across his back.

Without wasting another second he rushed out of the Institute and out into the night.

As the cold air hit his face a new vision flashes across his mind, a vision of the same Christmas scene. Except there he is sitting with Magnus on the sofa, and the toddler on the floor isn't Jace and Clary's son, he is his, his and Magnus' and all was right with the world.

As he rounded the corner away from the Institute, he never looked back.


End file.
